Style Me Bloggers: Random Acts of Kindness

You see it on bumper stickers: Practice Random Acts of Kindness. You hear the heartwarming stories on social media. It can also be called Pay It Forward, presumably from the movie of the same name.

My brother and his sweet family performed RAKs over Christmas time. They left a little note with a candy cane on people's cars or in their mailbox. They also left gifts at people's houses without saying it was from them. In fact, another friend and I received a cryptic text from a friend saying, "I know it was one of you!" The friend informed her that it was not us but she knew who it was and she wasn't telling. My brother and his wife want their children to get into the spirit of giving at Christmas and not just receiving.

Our pastor shared a story of a parishioner who paid for the car in line behind them in the drive through line at a local fast food restaurant. She drove off and didn't think anything of it. The next day, she had to return to that restaurant and the gal in the drive through window recognized the lady as the one who had performed the random act of kindness the day before  and was excited to share with her what had happened after that. The car that she had paid for had paid for the car behind them, and that car had paid for the car behind them and that continued for a full 40 minutes! This story brings to mind the song "It only takes a spark to get a fire going..."

Since hearing that story I have been inspired me to pay for the person behind me in a drive through line. Once I paid for a policeman in line behind me at Chik-fil-a, and more recently it was at Starbucks. The one at Starbucks was *really* random. The gal at the check out window had misunderstood my husband's order. She gave my husband a wrong drink. When she realized what she had done, she gave him the right drink but then in another misunderstanding she charged him for our drink and the car behind us. When she realized her mistake (the second time) she was really mortified. We just let it go and happily paid for the car behind us and were very pleasant to the cashier. She clearly was having a bad day!

One thing that I appreciate a lot is when someone lets me out in traffic. I know it's a southern thing and it happens a lot down here, but when I travel to other cities where that's not the norm, it reminds me to be thankful for those little things. Or lets me get in line in front of them at the grocery store when I only have one or two items and they have a cart-full. I've done it myself for other people. It really doesn't take much to put a smile on people's faces.

It just so happens that next week is Random Acts of Kindness Week, an annual seven-day celebration of kindness. On the surface, it’s a week dedicated to performing simple acts of kindness. But really? It’s an opportunity to make kindness the norm instead of the exception. Take a step out of your routine or your comfort zone to perform a new random act of kindness each day. Why? Well, Scientific studies show that performing acts of kindness actually improve health and life satisfaction. They increase energy, optimism, self-worth and our sense of belonging and connection in the world. PLUS they decrease anxiety, depression and blood pressure. But really, Jesus tells us that "it is more blessed to give than to receive."

If you decide to participate in this positive movement, you can post  your act of kindness on social media using #RAKWeek2015. If you need ideas, check out the graphic below for 10 simple ideas of things you can do to spread good cheer.

And then check out the Style Me Bloggers to see what kinds of RAK deeds they've performed to get more ideas!

Shoes to Shiraz | Two Teens and their Mama | A Lovely Little Wardrobe | R Squared 

Confessions of a Frumpy Mommy | Family Love Inspiration Education  

The Mishaps and Mayhem of Solitary Life | The Blondissima | Positively Learning | Quilty Joy Joy

 Daily Style Finds | Sheila's Potpourri | Puppies and Pretties | She thought She Could 
 Foxy's Domestic Side | Once Upon a Time & Happily Ever After | Sprinkled Just Right

Wine and Cheese party

Another fun get together happened just last Friday. In the "Bread and Wine" spirit we decided to host a wine and cheese party. Everyone was supposed to bring a wine and a cheese for tasting. We ended up with 11 people, a hearty mix of church and homeschool friends.

To add to the simple menu, I also made the bacon-wrapped goat cheese stuffed dates from the book and oh my WORD were they good! The perfect blend of sweet and salty. Annie helped me and we made quite a few, two cookie sheets full! A friend also brought brie tartlets which were also amazing! We also had my mother's fabulous sourdough bread, dried apricots, fresh grapes, Spanish olives and pecans. Michael and I made a meal out of it!

For my introverted self, this was a good sized party - big enough to have plenty of interesting conversations, yet small enough to be able to talk to everybody. In December I had hosted a ladies holiday party and even though all the gals that came were friends, not a stranger in the group, I felt myself retreating into my shell. So I'm learning to whittle the list down to make it more enjoyable, mix up the guest list and keep doing them! 

Follow-up to Bread and Wine

As a follow-up to my review on the book Bread and Wine, I decided I would blog about the times that we get together intentionally with friends, as a way for us to remember them (hammering a stake in the ground), a log of sorts.

The first one for this year happened to be a few weeks ago when a friend texted me to see if we were available to hang out that weekend. A quick glance at my Google calendar revealed that we were booked for both Friday and Saturday nights but Saturday morning was wide open. My amazing husband had the brilliant idea to invite them over for coffee and breakfast. Why should "entertaining" be exclusively an evening event?

So Saturday morning found us around the kitchen table drinking cappuccinos, eating scrambled eggs and bacon and catching up on the previous year since we hadn't been together in that much time. You know those friends that you just pick up where you left off? They are those kinds of friends and we quickly entered into deep conversation about the struggles and successes we are having in our family, in our work, and in our ministries. 

We have known this family for almost all of our married life together. We have gone to each other's children's baptisms and birthday parties, but somewhere along the way our lives drifted apart with the busyness of school, church activities, and the daily "tyranny of the urgent." Our kids used to be close friends but except for Facebook, I'm not sure they'd recognize each other now that are grown!

After a sweet SWEET time of prayer together we decided that we would not let much time go by before we got together again! 

Have you had friends over for breakfast rather than dinner? What did you serve? 

Summer Cooking School

I am teaching a Summer Cooking School series beginning tomorrow night. The idea began when a friend of mine asked me to show her some more simple recipes. I had cooked with her one night and she subsequently has made that same recipe several times for her family and wanted to learn some more easy recipes. I thought back to how I first learned to cook. It was in college, when I was sick of eating out and frozen food. I called mamma and asked her, over the phone, "How do you make Pasta e Fagioli?" And she described the process to me while I took notes. I was used to following a recipe but she didn't give actual measurements.  [Pour a little olive oil in a pan... But mom, how MUCH olive oil? Not too much, just a little...] and so I learned, by trial and error, and began sharing my creations with my roommates, and eventually my (now, but future to me then) husband.

So when I began to hatch my plan, I thought I would invite a few friends and share some of my easy, go-to, cheap, healthy Italian favorites. I then thought I would extend it to my whole church and use our church's wonderful kitchen. I had envisioned younger gals, maybe college-age or even later high school, to young adults, maybe newly- married, or newly-mommied. I was surprised at who started registering for the class: younger, yes - but also older, and even some men! In fact I was standing in the produce section of Publix a few days ago, talking to a friend I had run into. She asked me a few questions about the class, what sorts of things we'd be cooking, etc. and I was describing some of the recipes to her. A man overheard us and asked if I was teaching a cooking class and if it was open to anyone. My husband handed him his business card and told him to email him for directions. How funny is that??

Pasta alla Puttanesca

My plan it to teach one recipe and then explain similar ones so everyone can go home and try making even more easy recipes. Since I am visual and I learn by doing, everyone will have a chance to watch how it's done, then do it themselves. Kinda like med school, right? See one, do one, teach one. We will work in groups and it should be pretty fun.

This week the theme is Quick Red Sauces, the kind of homemade sauce that you can make in the time it takes the pasta to boil (like the picture above.) When the pasta is done, so is the sauce. We will be making Spaghetti all'Amatriciana. Some variations include Penne alla Puttanesca, Penne all'Arrabbiata, Pasta Sciue' Sciue', and Aglio Olio e Peperoncino. Of course we'll get to sample what we make. Interested? Make sure you tell me you're coming! At this point I'm planning on about 20 people.

Surprise!

I love surprises, when they are good ones!

Yesterday we hosted a surprise party for our good friend John Holmquist who turned 50. He is a crime scene investigator and very keen on picking up things so his wife and I weren't sure if we'd be able to pull it off. It helped that we were one week removed from his actual birthday and that we had had a small gathering on his actual birthday. So to have them over for dinner the following week was just business as usual.

However, it was NOT a usual gathering at all. His parents and sister's family came as well as quite a few friends. We had people park at my parents' house so that he wouldn't see all the cars parked out front (and you can be sure he knows who drives what car). His wife, Denise, called to ask if there was anything she could bring. That was our clue that they were on the way so we could hide. Annie had decorated the kitchen and dining room but the living area wasn't decorated so he couldn't see anything suspicious from the door. We got a little silly as we waited for the birthday boy to arrive.

 Finally he arrived...

He was pretty surprised! (See how red he is here?!)

Quite a food spread. Everyone brought something and it was all yummy!

My brother, David, was the grill master. He did a great job grilling chicken and brats.

Tracy, whose birthday was the previous day, and Michael were the wing fryers. They, too, did a wonderful job!

As you can see, everyone had a wonderful time!

We had an extra little surprise when it was time for cake...Tracy had one too! Louise Glennon, baker extraordinaire, made John's cake. Tracy, who loves ice cream, didn't have a cake per se. I made him John's recipe of oreos layered with chocolate syrup and vanilla ice cream. It was a hit.

We finished off the night by sitting by the fire pit. The weather was PERFECT for it! I was too busy sitting and enjoying to take pictures. You'll just have to imagine it. All in all, it was a perfect surprise party.

Accountability

Years ago, when we were still in youth ministry, Michael and I attended a Youth Specialties convention where we heard a speaker whose message has stayed with me all these years. He encouraged us to have "a Paul, a Barnabas and a Timothy." In other words, to have someone that you are under (that is mentoring you), someone who is a peer (who is encouraging you) and someone you are mentoring. I have tried to live that way.

Today I met with my "Paul." She may not even know she is my Paul but she is someone who, over the years, I have been able to ask all sorts of questions..."How did you handle _____?" "What did you do about _____?" "I'm about to lose my mind over __________!! Help!" She has patiently listened to me, offering advice and prayer. Typically, every 4 to 8 months or so, I would shoot her an email asking for a coffee date. We would pick a day/time/location and I would come, pen and paper in hand with my list of questions, ready to take notes.

Today was a little different. We met for coffee but this time I didn't have "a problem". It was refreshing to just catch up and check in with each other. I updated her on all the goings on in my life, and she told me about new challenges in her life. Two hours rushed quickly by and I've been ruminating and smiling to myself all day thinking of our time together.

How about you? Do you have a Paul, a Barnabas and a Timothy? If not, then I encourage you to look around. Who do you admire that you would like to spend time with or learn from? Ask her out on a date! Who is your peer that shares your same woes and delights? Meet with her and share prayer requests. Bear one another's burdens. Laugh and cry together. And finally, who are you mentoring? Titus 2 tells older women to teach the younger women. There is always someone younger than you! Even high school gals can teach a middle schooler or 4th/5th grader.

I encourage you to find partners in accountability. It's all part of living in community!